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The Cruel Cycle of Negativity

How to combat an unhealthy mindset

Especially in high school, stress and negativity can become very prominent in someone’s mind. That can come from pessimism, judgment, self-hatred, disdain for others, and general unhappiness with changes or insecurity. If you are in this situation, you are most definitely not alone.

Despite what it may feel like, it is possible to significantly reduce these feelings with a few changes, resulting in a healthier mindset.


Once you are in a depressive state, it can feel nearly impossible to get out of it because of the cruel cycle you can fall into. When one thinks so negatively all the time and is clouded with that energy, it attracts more unfortunate things towards them. Like-minded people are drawn into each other, so if you are mentally unstable, chances are the people you surround yourself with are as well. Negativity also drives good things away. It’s unfortunate to have people dislike or, at the very least, avoid you for this, as it is not your fault that you’re going through whatever you’re going through. However, your person is reflected in how you act and what you say; the truth is, that’s what matters most regarding the relationships and opportunities in your life.


In addition to this, the attention you can get from your stress, depression, or insecure state can be intoxicatingly addicting. One can learn to settle in this state enough to a point where they don’t even want to get out of it, and in many extreme situations, romanticize their depression. So, with negativity attracting similar energy, making someone fall deeper into that echo chamber, and adding the touch of attention one can get, it begs the question: Is it possible for me to break this cycle? 


The short answer is: of course, but that is, as most things, easier said than done. The most important thing to remember is that this exact cycle also applies to positivity and is a much healthier alternative for you and the people around you. So, the most logical step is to gradually replace that negativity with positivity, which begs another question: How do I do that?

There is no straightforward answer, but there are many things you can incorporate into your everyday life that will help you learn to love yourself, your environment, and the people around you.


Don’t take yourself so seriously.

Something that adds incredible amounts of stress is taking everything so seriously.

Once you realize that not everything, in fact, most things throughout your day, don’t have to be taken seriously, then life won’t feel as heavy and stressful. Be able to laugh at yourself and be more light-hearted about situations.

By gradually implementing this, you will start to notice a relief of pressure, like a huge burden is being lifted.


Surround yourself with good people.

One of the biggest secrets in life is that people change people.

Being around people who support you and make you feel happy and comfortable will make the most significant difference. Naturally, you will try to adapt to the people around you, and if you surround yourself with positive and supportive people, you will slowly see yourself become that happy light in other people’s lives as well.

You, yourself, can be strong enough to become the positive influence instead of the negatively influenced.


Find a passion.

Think about something you love to do that brings you passion and dedication. Whether playing an instrument, football, acting, crocheting, chemistry, journaling, etc. If you can’t think of anything, spend time finding it. However, it’s important to not stress about finding the right thing but to spend time trying, learning, and experiencing new things, even if you end up not enjoying something you try.

Having something to be passionate about is incredibly essential. It gives you something to do, work on, and focus your energy on. If you don’t have something to do, what else is there to do but dwell on all the terrible things. Falling into that rabbit hole becomes much easier, and you will burn out all your energy on that.

So, spend time on your hobbies and find new ones to try.


Live in the moment.

Holding on to the past or worrying about the future takes a much larger toll on a person than they might realize. You’ve probably been told to live in the moment often but think about it. Actually, try to incorporate it as much as possible. Become conscious of it.

Let yourself breathe and take in the wrong moments. And more importantly, take your time to deeply appreciate every good moment and treasure it in your mind so that in the future, you have memories you can cherish.

If you do this, you will find yourself starting to feel happier. Before, you might’ve been easily upset by the most minor things. Now, you may even become excited about the littlest things, adding to the overall joy you feel each day.


There are many other things, but I feel these are essential to change since they helped me break out of that cruel negative cycle and become the joyful, positive person I am today. I really hope these tips help you achieve that as well.

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